2.12.11
23.8.11
Slience is not Gold.
Seriously!!! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME??? I have no problem talking to anyone- mom, bro, friends, friends' parents, other adults, other kids, strangers- Everyone!! except for me dad =/....
I can never start a conversation with him nor I can ever tell him anything about my recent life. Every time I am on the phone with him, I sounded like someone ripped out my vocal cord, "Hi dad.... nothing much.... I.....er...... ah. ......er.................................." (pulling my hair at this point)
To him, my recent life is a ______________________, and yes I left that part out because that's exactly what he thinks. It really frustrates him, it really frustrates me too.
I feel like I am always trying to find the right thing to say, but delayed too long, making the phone calls into awkward silences.
The worst part is there is no bad blood between us, I mean normal working dad, normal son(I hope), normal healthy family, there're no big fights or anything. So I don't know when it started, or what happened that make me not being able to talk to him.
Maybe I feel like I am not living up to his expectation, but ended up making things 10000 times worse by not telling him anything =/
ARGH! I am really hating myself about it =[
I can never start a conversation with him nor I can ever tell him anything about my recent life. Every time I am on the phone with him, I sounded like someone ripped out my vocal cord, "Hi dad.... nothing much.... I.....er...... ah. ......er.................................." (pulling my hair at this point)
To him, my recent life is a ______________________, and yes I left that part out because that's exactly what he thinks. It really frustrates him, it really frustrates me too.
I feel like I am always trying to find the right thing to say, but delayed too long, making the phone calls into awkward silences.
The worst part is there is no bad blood between us, I mean normal working dad, normal son(I hope), normal healthy family, there're no big fights or anything. So I don't know when it started, or what happened that make me not being able to talk to him.
Maybe I feel like I am not living up to his expectation, but ended up making things 10000 times worse by not telling him anything =/
ARGH! I am really hating myself about it =[
25.3.11
Dinner Time
This is probably the silliest rant ever, but why do people only call me during my dinner time, I mean seriously, all day long and not a single call and when I am eating, Bam! long phone calls....
I am fed up of eating cold dinner >=[
I am fed up of eating cold dinner >=[
28.2.11
Respect.
This morning mom text me:
ＲＥＳＰＥＣＴ！
祖母現在還是不穩定，腳無力，走路不穩，晚上睡不好，呼吸不順，但是樣樣還說‘我自己來’，不要人幫。看著一個慢慢移動的身體，給我不少的連想，祖母是個最普通的人，但那種獨立性格,卻令人敬佩。Roughly Translated to :Although Grandma is still not feeling well- having trouble breathing, Always tired, not sleeping well, she still say "I'll do it myself" all the time. She never asks for help. Looking at her slowly working, gave me a lot of thought. Grandma is an ordinary woman, but her independent personality is worth the highest respect.
ＲＥＳＰＥＣＴ！
1.2.11
Life, Death and Somewhere in Between
January is finally over. A lot had happened, and yet it has been one of my most unproductive times. As the title has stated, this post is all about life and death.
First of all, My cousin Margaret just had a new baby Girl named Jesslyn last month. Congratulation =P
She is my Nephew/Niece no. 10 on my mother's side, my huge family is just getting bigger haha. Isn't she just adorable..=P
But not all news are good news. 2 weeks ago, my friend's mother passed away and quite a couple of my Uni Friends attended the funeral. It was a really sad moment. And I can't help feeling guilty all that time, since I had always been telling her everything will be ok for the past year but what did I know. Although she seems like she is handling it well, i donno, everything's just weird.. it's also sad that this is the largest friends gathering since convo. =[
Everything happened in January makes me homesick. I actually haven't felt this way for the past 7 years. The last time I was this homesick was the first 3 months of my boarding school experience.
Anyways, that's it for the sobbing. Other than the life and death, I am somewhere in between, living, and baking a lot apparently (random)... anyways, that's another story.
PS. Le Concert is a really awesome movie... a lot better than expected. It is a French/ Russian movie about a world famous conductor being intercepted during a concerto and lost his job 30 years ago and has a crazy plot to gather up his old orchestra teammates and finally complete his Tchaikovsky concerto.
Richard's out.
She is my Nephew/Niece no. 10 on my mother's side, my huge family is just getting bigger haha. Isn't she just adorable..=P
But not all news are good news. 2 weeks ago, my friend's mother passed away and quite a couple of my Uni Friends attended the funeral. It was a really sad moment. And I can't help feeling guilty all that time, since I had always been telling her everything will be ok for the past year but what did I know. Although she seems like she is handling it well, i donno, everything's just weird.. it's also sad that this is the largest friends gathering since convo. =[
Everything happened in January makes me homesick. I actually haven't felt this way for the past 7 years. The last time I was this homesick was the first 3 months of my boarding school experience.
Anyways, that's it for the sobbing. Other than the life and death, I am somewhere in between, living, and baking a lot apparently (random)... anyways, that's another story.
PS. Le Concert is a really awesome movie... a lot better than expected. It is a French/ Russian movie about a world famous conductor being intercepted during a concerto and lost his job 30 years ago and has a crazy plot to gather up his old orchestra teammates and finally complete his Tchaikovsky concerto.
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